Life is pretty much failing me. I've not got much done. I've got no awards and no recognition because I don't do anything. I paint and draw and colour and sing and dance but nobody looks and nobody goes out of their way to notice aside from the select few who turn their heads in my classrooms and tell me, "I wish I could do that", "I envy your skills". I don't mind that. I hope you are doing better to get yourself out there, though. I also hope you look back at this note and laugh. I hope you laugh really hard. I hope that my pessimistic views on the world will change. At the same time, I hope they don't. Ever. I hope you made a difference in how people think. I know it's a big thing to hope for, but I hope you get out there and make some form of a mark. Everyone hopes that, I think, for themselves. I know that. But I don't care, I still hope you change the world, or at least, let the world know what you think. Or even, just a small community in the underground worlds of Seattle...Something. However you do it, I don't care, just do it. Also, go marry Amanda Palmer, even though she's still way older than you. Anyway, here are some notes I'd like you to read from your teenage self in her little teenage world.
First off, I want to say that I'm not really one to judge people right off the bat. I never look at someone and say, "Jesus Christ- she's so dumb! I hate her!" I don't respect people who do that. I hope you're not like that. I don't want to be you if you do. But either way, keep that in mind while reading my views on people here.
I hate people. I really do. I tried. So hard. I tried so hard to start liking people. I always, my whole entire life, avoided people. People thought I was ugly, and fat, and weird. I was told that on a day-to-day basis for many many years. In return, I thought they were all ugly. And normal. We don't mix, never did, never will. Found that out. There are a few people I admire. I'll keep admiring some people, and maybe even new people if I find anybody new that deserve my admiration. Obviously I'm not going to shut everybody out. But I'm a critical person. I always have been. Trying to put that nature behind me is wrong, I think. I can be a hyper critical bitch if I want to be. But, I'll also always be a humble, caring person too.
Some people live in this bubble and can't say anything to the world aside from what's happening to them. No relevant opinions. No vocabulary. No brain. Nothing to back them up aside from a makeup covered face an expensive bag and a Mercedes the parents they so hate bought them for their sixteenth birthday. All they have is their little circle of friends they tell their little life stories to, and then back stab repeatedly. The horror stories from the junior high (and stuff from my school too) scare the crap out of me. Is being disrespectful in style? Sure as hell seems like it. If you have children I am afraid for you. I am afraid for your and what you have to go through every day. I hope your, my children do not end up like them.
And whenever I look at these people... I say, "I wish the world were less like this". I always do. But when I really think about it... I don't. I don't wish the world were more responsible. I don't wish everyone thought like I do. Because then I wouldn't be the same person. I wouldn't be me, I'd just be an average person, and so would everybody that stands out in this world. I wouldn't wish it upon the world even with my life on the line. A perfect world where everyone is at least somewhat intelligent, where people cared about others and everything around them rather than themselves and where nobody was a backstabbing, close-minded asshole is not what I want. I like this world...I like being able to complain and see the world from the view I see it from. I guess it's a bit of a roundabout that way.
Until next time.
First off, I want to say that I'm not really one to judge people right off the bat. I never look at someone and say, "Jesus Christ- she's so dumb! I hate her!" I don't respect people who do that. I hope you're not like that. I don't want to be you if you do. But either way, keep that in mind while reading my views on people here.
I hate people. I really do. I tried. So hard. I tried so hard to start liking people. I always, my whole entire life, avoided people. People thought I was ugly, and fat, and weird. I was told that on a day-to-day basis for many many years. In return, I thought they were all ugly. And normal. We don't mix, never did, never will. Found that out. There are a few people I admire. I'll keep admiring some people, and maybe even new people if I find anybody new that deserve my admiration. Obviously I'm not going to shut everybody out. But I'm a critical person. I always have been. Trying to put that nature behind me is wrong, I think. I can be a hyper critical bitch if I want to be. But, I'll also always be a humble, caring person too.
Some people live in this bubble and can't say anything to the world aside from what's happening to them. No relevant opinions. No vocabulary. No brain. Nothing to back them up aside from a makeup covered face an expensive bag and a Mercedes the parents they so hate bought them for their sixteenth birthday. All they have is their little circle of friends they tell their little life stories to, and then back stab repeatedly. The horror stories from the junior high (and stuff from my school too) scare the crap out of me. Is being disrespectful in style? Sure as hell seems like it. If you have children I am afraid for you. I am afraid for your and what you have to go through every day. I hope your, my children do not end up like them.
And whenever I look at these people... I say, "I wish the world were less like this". I always do. But when I really think about it... I don't. I don't wish the world were more responsible. I don't wish everyone thought like I do. Because then I wouldn't be the same person. I wouldn't be me, I'd just be an average person, and so would everybody that stands out in this world. I wouldn't wish it upon the world even with my life on the line. A perfect world where everyone is at least somewhat intelligent, where people cared about others and everything around them rather than themselves and where nobody was a backstabbing, close-minded asshole is not what I want. I like this world...I like being able to complain and see the world from the view I see it from. I guess it's a bit of a roundabout that way.
Until next time.
1 comments:
<3333
Love you muchlies, dear. So do the rest of us. Dont ever forget that.
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